In this day and age, you can do a lot with your phone. You can place calls to important connections instantly. You can browse the web and check your emails. Even reply to your emails. And you can get a woman absolutely hooked on you – if your texting approach is the right approach. So with that comes our latest blog of dating tips, texting secrets to making women want to talk with you.
Many guys don’t know how to text a girl. Of course, they know how to send text messages to a girl of interest…but they don’t know how to actually get that girl attracted and interested in going out on a date. So most guys flounder about, sending semi-lame text messages that go nowhere fast.
But it doesn’t have to be that way. Not at all, actually. Texting, after all, is just another form of communication. And we know from psychology that we can communicate in very specific ways that get people interested in us and what we have to say. In fact, at the heart of successfully dating hot women is psychology – using basic psychological principles that get a woman addicted to you. It’s the same principles that have been used by great speakers, marketers, and many other great individuals whose job it is to get people to do something.
And as a cursory introduction to how you can use your phone to get her attracted to you, you will discover here a simple texting “formula” you can use to quickly build attraction and get her to want to go out on a date with you. This will drastically cut down the number of rejections you get.
Without any other unnecessary preambles, here’s the texting formula you’ll want to use:
Attention → Interest → Desire → Meeting Up
This might not make very much sense when you first see it, so let’s break it down – starting with the first message.
Stage 1: She gave you her number, and now it’s time to text her. Here’s where most guys instantly kill the attraction. They send something like:
“Hey, what’s up?”
Boom. That kills the attraction the girl might have originally had for you. Don’t ever send messages like that – certainly not if you’re just beginning to text her. Why? Because this girl is bombarded constantly with everyone and everything fighting for her attention. She’s got Snapchat, Facebook, and Instagram. She’s got people texting her. So your “What’s up?” message comes across as painfully boring. And she’ll immediately forget about it and you. It doesn’t affect her emotionally – not one tiny bit.
So the key to sending a successful first text is to say that something that grabs her attention. And one of the best ways to do that is to make that text personalized to her. In other words, use something you know about her and weave that into your first text.
For instance, maybe she’s told you that she’s into fashion. So you could create a little text like this:
“Hey fashionista, you’ll never guess what happened today ;-)”
See that? That does two things: (1) by calling her “fashionista” (or “fashion girl,” or some other nickname) you’ve personalized this text to her and it’ll grab her attention; (2) by saying “you’ll never guess what happened today,” you’re using a cliffhanger – now she’s got to find out what it is you’re talking about, and she’ll be inclined to respond!
Stage 2: Now that she’s responded to your initial text, and the two of you have engaged in light, fun, flirty conversation, it’s time to keep her interest in you. You got her attention, and now you need to sustain it with something that’ll spark her interest. And you can do that, for example, by talking with her about things she personally finds interesting. But the key here is to always keep the conversation light and fun with the banter going back and forth. Then, you go onto the next stage of this texting formula.
Stage 3: This might seem counter-intuitive…but now that she’s genuinely interested in talking with you, it’s time to pull back! “What?” you say. “Why would I do that? Won’t that make her upset?”
But answer this: what happens when she suddenly stops texting you? You want to text her even more, and you can’t wait for her next text. And you wind up wondering things like, “What did I say or do that was wrong?” All of this means that you become even more emotionally invested in her when she stops texting you. So why can’t guys do that?
When you suddenly stop texting her – you don’t reply as quickly as you normally do (of course, don’t drag this out for too long) – she becomes even more emotionally invested in you and this conversation with you. And you also signal to her that you have your own life, you’re doing your own things – achieving your own objectives in life – and that makes you quite attractive to her. This stokes her desire for you to a greater level.
Stage 4: Once you’ve begun texting her again, you’ll want to immediately set up a place and time to meet up with her. This, again, is where a lot of guys fall flat and get rejected. Here’s how a lot of guys word their text messages when hoping to set up a date with her:
“So I was thinking…if you’re not busy on Friday night, would you perhaps like to go out?”
Ugh. Once again, that’s a boring, lifeless text that she probably has gotten lots of times in the past. It doesn’t do anything for her on a visceral, emotional level. You should, instead grab her attention and spark her interest when asking her out – and don’t be timid about it! Be confident, assertive. Here’s an example of how to ask her out on a date:
“In the mood for sushi! Roll with me this Fri night at 8:08. You’ll want to try the unagi!”
See how not boring and bland that is? Instead, it’s lighthearted, confident, and playful. Also, here’s a hint: this is a little weird, but you’ll often get a more positive response if the time you suggest isn’t typical. For example, in the text message above, the suggested time is 8:08, instead of 8:00 or 8:30. It’s just one more thing that grabs her attention and doesn’t make your text come across as deathly serious.
And that is how you become the most important guy in her phone – the guy she always wants to talk to and has a blast when texting you. Promise yourself that you’ll stop texting in boring, lifeless way. Try the above formula – and you’ll start having better success when texting women you’re attracted to!
