No, you aren't the only one struggling with dating.
In fact, many people around the world are having trouble with it. Dating has become a complicated mess for a variety of reasons. As a professional matchmaker, I’ve identified some of the biggest issues that contribute to the tangled web of modern dating.
First, and it’s a big one, people like Andrew Tate and David DeAngelou becoming popular with toxic narratives and unethical dating practices have confused even the most seasoned dater. They preach an “alpha”-style of dating, which encourages people to be aggressive, manipulative and unempathetic in order to get what they want from a potential partner. This type of advice only serves to damage the emotional wellbeing of those who listen to it and creates a hostile environment for healthy dating. There is a reason that women want chivalry and men want respect, and it’s because those are vital building blocks for a successful relationship. The idea that you have to be a “player” and put women down to succeed is quite frankly, BS.
So many of us suffer from self-imposed pressures as a result of modern dating. With the rise of social media, it’s easy to compare yourself to others and feel like you have to conform in order to fit in. We can be endlessly judged for our looks and lifestyle choices such as what we post on Instagram or how many dates we’ve been on recently – this only serves to add more stress and anxiety onto the already difficult world of dating.
In addition, the prevalence of online dating has led to a culture where people expect instant gratification. Dating apps allow us to easily swipe through potential partners with minimal effort, which can make it very easy for someone to discard a potential match after just one date or even one conversation. With so many people to choose from, those who use these apps can be quick to discard a person if they show even the slightest hint of imperfection or disagreement. This can lead people to be less patient and more likely to just move onto the next person if they feel like they’re not getting what they want quickly enough.
We live in a society where we are constantly bombarded with unrealistic expectations of relationships, love and romance. We are given highly edited and curated images or ideas of what the “perfect” relationship should look like and it can be difficult to measure up to these standards. This pressure can lead to people feeling insecure about themselves or their relationships, making it even harder for them to make meaningful connections with someone. Technology has changed the way we communicate and interact with others. We no longer need to be face-to-face in order to communicate; text messages and social media platforms have taken over as the primary ways of communication. This has led to people relying more on their smartphones than actually going out and meeting someone in person.
So what do you do?
Well, it’s time to start taking matters into your own hands. Don’t be afraid to challenge the status quo and find what works for you. Be honest with yourself and your partner about what you want out of a relationship and don’t let anyone else dictate your decisions. Find someone who is willing to respect you for who you are and don’t settle for anything less. It may take some time, but it’s worth it in the end!
At the end of the day, dating is all about having fun in REAL LIFE and getting to know someone else. Don’t let toxic narratives or unrealistic expectations stop you from finding a meaningful connection with someone. With a little bit of courage and a lot of patience, you can find happiness in the modern dating world.
Overall, it’s no wonder why dating is so complicated these days. With the rise of toxic advice, increased competition from social media and lack of patience from online dating, it’s easy to lose sight of what makes a relationship truly meaningful and successful. The best thing we can do is cultivate an honest and understanding attitude towards dating, and be kind to ourselves as well as our potential partners. That way, we can start to make the tangled web of modern dating a little bit easier to navigate.
Need some more help? Book a call with a member of our matchmaking team today.